tonight was a youth night but no one showed up (for those who don’t know i’m a youth pastor at a church in aurora, ON that has been going through some serious issues for about a year now, but we’re starting to see the light). anyways, it’s just kind of discouraging/frustrating when you have this night planned and you have all of these expectations of what God will do in the lives of your kids and then no one shows. now i realize that it was fathers day AND highschools have their exams this week, but at the same time, it’s hard for me not to feel like a failure in cases like this. this just adds fuel to the fire of my feelings of incompetancy. anyways, once i got over myself i decided to go to a local park, which brings me to the next part of my evening…
i was lying on the grass in the park, pretty much in silence, just trying to listen to God. i really appreciated that time i had to just lie there and do nothing. for that 1/2 hour i didn’t have any worries. i didn’t care what time it was. i had no where to be. no stressors. just me and a patch of grass. the spot where i lay was on top of a hill and i overlooked a little lake (more of a giant pond really) and a big grassy field with a path running alongside it. given that it was a beautiful evening there were lots of people out walking etc. so as i sat and watched people go by there were a couple of things i noticed…
1) there was a little blonde boy out for a walk with his parents. he was quite young, no older than 3 maybe and his father had a camcorder to record all of his sons adventures in the park. the funny thing about this boy was that his parents couldn’t keep him walking for more than 10 feet at a time. it seemed that every other moment something would catch his attention and he would stop to examine it. a couple rode past on bicycles. a dog went by on a leash. he spotted something on the ground (quite possibly a bug of some variety). and what i found most interesting was that he wouldn’t just watch whatever it was that caught his attention, he would stop, stare and then point at whatever it was. then he would make this little grunting/cheering noise as if to say, “that’s cool!” this little boy just had such a sense of discovery. to him, these were all new experiences. he was allowed to roam free in this gigantic (from his perspective) park and you can imagine how his senses must have been having a party at all of these fresh/new discoveries. this got me thinking: when Jesus tells us to have childlike faith, does this include some sort of sense of discovery? an excitement at all of these new things we learn as our relationship with God develops?
2) i saw this young couple kicking a soccer ball back and forth. every couple of kicks the guy would just *boot* it and his girlfriend would have to go running after it. he kept saying sorry, but then he’d do it again a couple minutes later. i laughed to myself the first couple of times and then i just thought he was a jerk.
3) i randomly looked to my right at one point and noticed that a man had come and sit on the hill beside me about 15 feet away (which was wierd/creepy enough since he was completely silent about it). what was really strange though was the fact that he had a ferrett (sp?) with him. i don’t appreciate those animals much. i find them rather creepy. but the man seemed to like it as he sat there stroking the thing. wierd.
that’s all for the park. i went home and got a call from 5 of my youth about 10 minutes after getting in the door saying they were heading down to the same park and wanted me to join them. so i did. we played grounders on the park and it was loads of fun. we then went to timmy’s for some cold drinks and relaxation.